No more "I'm sorry"
I was sitting with a client yesterday who was sharing a painful experience and began to cry. Reaching for a tissue she said, "I'm sorry" and I realized in that moment how often that happens. My perspective may be slightly narrow in scope due to my work, but I experience this in my everyday life outside of my office as well. Women apologize for feeling, for emoting more often than not. Many of them simply apologize for being, one apology I am personally acquainted with. You know what I mean, you're at the grocery store and someone bumps into you and you say, "I'm sorry." That was my mantra for years, thankfully I worked through that little issue. Maybe that's why I notice it so often. It's interesting but the men I work with never apologize for crying, by the way. Yes I realize these are huge generalizations, but I have been doing this work for decades, and it is consistently the case. Wow, did I say "decades"? Well, that is for another day's post...Anyway, I'm curious what others think of this? Why do we as women feel the need to apologize for our feelings, for showing vulnerability? What has our culture taught us as women that makes us feel badly for being human? I have my own speculations of course but really do want to hear from others on this topic. I think if you start to pay attention you'll see it too either in yourself or in those with whom you interact, and when you do please don't apologize. Make a commitment to yourself of "no more 'I'm sorry'"